The Nigerian Electricity Regulatory Commission (NERC) has announced the deregulation of meter prices under the meter asset provider (MAP) scheme for end-user customers.

This is contained in a circular issued by the commission on Monday.

In September 2023, NERC approved an increase in the prices of single-phase electricity meters to N81,975.16 and three-phase meters was increased to N143,836.10. 

According to the circular, from May 1, all prices of meters under the MAP scheme will be determined through a competitive bidding process with customers provided with a choice of authorised vendors.

According to the commission, the review is based on the need for the efficient pricing of meters “to respond more quickly to changes in macroeconomic parameters, particularly exchange rates”. 

“The cost of prices of meters deployed under the MAP scheme is thereby to enable end-use customers acquire meters from MAPS of their choice based on competitive open market prices determined from transparent bidding frameworks,” NERC said. 

“All MAP permits holders are henceforth eligible to provide services and transact for the provision of meters and metering services with any Disco in the Federal Republic of Nigeria with their existing permit. 

“The lifting of the restriction on permitting to operate in all DisCos is subject to the mandatory requirement for MAPS to comply with the associated DisCo specific requirements/specifications.”

NERC said all electricity distribution companies (DisCos) would ensure the effective and seamless integration of smart meters deployed by MAPS with DisCo’s head-end systems and metre data management systems.

[TheCable]

The Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board (JAMB) has officially announced the release of the results for the 2024 Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examination (UTME).

Naija News reports that the announcement was made by JAMB’s Registrar, Prof. Ishaq Oloyede, during a press conference on Monday at the board’s headquarters in Bwari, Abuja.

The examination body disclosed that the 2024 examination saw a record participation of over 1.94 million candidates, spreading across 118 towns and more than 700 centres throughout the country.

“The 2024 UTME has been successfully conducted, and we are pleased to announce the timely release of the results. Candidates can now check their scores via the official JAMB portal,” stated Prof. Oloyede.

The UTME, which began on Friday, April 19, and concluded on Monday, April 29, 2024, is a pivotal exam that determines eligibility for tertiary education in Nigeria.

The press conference highlighted the logistical efforts undertaken by JAMB to ensure a smooth and fair examination process.

“This year, we enhanced our monitoring and surveillance of the examination centres to curtail malpractices and ensure compliance with our strict testing standards,” added Oloyede.

More to follow…

[NaijaNews]

One year has elapsed since former President Mohammadu Buhari approved the postponement of the 2023 population and housing census.

The suspension was disclosed in a press statement signed by the former Minister of Information and Culture, Lai Mohammed. The minister noted that the president approved it following a meeting with Nasir Isa-Kwarra, the Chairman of the National Population Commission (NPC), and the Accountant General of the Federation, the Finance Minister and some other members of the Federal Executive Council (FEC) at the Presidential Villa, Abuja.

In 2022, the NPC declared that N532.7 billion would be needed to conduct the national census in Nigeria.

However, the former Minister of State for Budget and National Planning, Clem Agba, said that a total of N869 billion was needed for the census, noting that the government committed N291.5 billion with the need for an additional N327.2 billion from the private sector.

The census was slated for May 3-7, 2023, but was postponed indefinitely by the administration of former President Muhammadu Buhari.

Despite the postponement, the NPC admitted having spent N200 billion for the planning mid-execution of the census.

How the money was spent

A Federal High Court in Abuja recently ordered the NPC to disclose expenditure details related to the suspended 2023 Population Census within seven days.

Justifying the amount spent, the former commission’s Director of Public Affairs, Dr Isiaka Yahaya, earlier said:

He said:

• “Consistent with global practice and inspired by an unswerving commitment to positively rewrite the history of the census in Nigeria, the Commission opted to conduct a digital census deploying the technology on a massive scale.
• “In a country struggling with an acute infrastructural deficit, this massive undertaking cannot come cheap but at a huge cost. Yes, it is true that N200bn has been spent on preparations for the 2023 census so far. However, this fund was not expended in the last few weeks, months, or years but rather since 2014 when preparations for the 2023 census actually began. Indeed, part of the N200bn was expended before the coming of the present Commission, which was inaugurated twice between 2018 and 2020 and even before the inception of the Buhari administration.”

The former director also disclosed that several items have been procured in preparation for the census, such as the procurement of computers, laptops, desktops, printers, software, and solar power systems for the census, among others.

He added that about 810,000 personal digital assistant devices were acquired for the 2023 census and were stored in all the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) offices across the country.

Yahaya also identified other expenses, noting:

• “The Commission procured vehicles, motorcycles, and boats for the movement of personnel and equipment across the length and breadth of the country. This was done along with renovation and equipping of all the 37 state and 774 Local Government offices for effective operational activities and storage for the 2023 Census.
• “Conducting a digital census requires a constant supply of electricity not only in the cities but also in the hinterland and hard-to-reach areas of the country for charging of PDAs and other equipment. Given the epileptic nature of power supply across the country, the Commission procured generators, power banks and installed solar power systems across the country.”

The House of Representatives plans to probe the N200 billion spent on the suspended 2023 Population and Housing Census.

Also, during the Commission’s 2024 budget defence at the National Assembly (NASS), the House of Representatives Committee on Population urged the Federal Government to complete the census preparation process. This was even as the committee maintained that with the preparation process currently at 80%, nothing should stop the national census from holding.

What You Should Know

Nairametrics earlier reported that the NPC requested for N693.3 million in the 2024 budget to conduct the postponed national population and housing census. This is higher than the N10.52 million requested for the same fiscal item in the approved 2023 budget.

However, it was observed that there was another allocation of N30 billion for outstanding activities for the postponed 2023 census in the approved budget for this year. Also, it was observed that there are other census-related allocations of about N122.2 million in the proposed 2024 budget.

It has been reported that the postponed census may be held in November 2024.

Speaking with Nairametrics, a development economist, Dr Aliyu Ilias, said that conducting the census is necessary for economic development.

He said:

• “Majority of decisions to develop and provide facilities for a country, states, local government are based on the number of people using it. Census has direct relationships with economic development. A good example is the provision of schools, health facilities, and roads, among others.
• “If we don’t have a census, we will be providing facilities where it is not needed, while people that need it, suffer.”

Also, a Professor of Demography at Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria, Kaduna State, John Laah, stressed the importance of the census in the country, urging the administration of Bola Tinubu to conduct the census as soon as possible.

• “This government needs census more than any other government. We don’t have the statistics to plan… If we conduct a census, it will help the government in making necessary plans. The absence of a complete census is a problem for Nigeria….
• “Census must be regular to make it useful and appropriate for government to plan for the deliveries of dividends of democracy. This government more than any other government needs to conduct census immediately so that it can kick-start the process of making genuine plans for the people.”

He further noted that the census is possible this year, adding that there is a need for refresher training for those earlier trained in 2022 and 2023, and that the census can be done within three to four months.

The Acting Director of the Public Affairs Department of the NPC, Mrs. Nkoyo Nwakusor, did not respond to calls and WhatsApp messages sent to her as of the time of filing this story.

[Nairametrics]

A Federal High Court in Abuja, on Monday, ordered the stoppage of the planned increase in DStv and GOtv subscription prices by Multichoice Nigeria Limited.

LEADERSHIP reports that the Pay-TV operator, Multichoice Nigeria Limited, had last week announced another price increment across its DStv and GOtv packages effective May 1, 2024.

The company attributed the price increases to “rise in the cost of business operations” in Nigeria.

According to the notice signed by Multichoice CEO, John Ugbe, and sent to its subscribers and customers via email last week Wednesday, a copy of which was sighted by our Correspondent, the new prices for DStv packages are Premium package will now cost N37,000 monthly as against the current N29,500 subscription fee.

The price of the Compact+ bouquet has also increased to N25,000 from 19,800 monthly.

DStv said subscribers on its Compact bouquet will now pay N15,700 as against N12,500 they are currently paying, while those on the Confam package are to pay N9,300, compared to N7,400 currently being paid.

Under the new price regime, viewers on DStv Yanga bouquet will now be paying N5,100 for the monthly subscription, instead of the N4,200 currently being paid.

Padi subscribers will, from May 1, 2024, be paying N3,600 instead of the current N2,950 price.

HDPVR Access subscribers will pay N5,000 as against the N4,000 being paid now.

For GOtv users, Multichoice said customers on its Supa Plus package will now be paying N15,700, from the current price of N12,500. Its Supa bouquet will now go for N9,600 as opposed to the current N7,600 being charged.

GOtv Max subscription has also increased to N7,200 from N5,700 while its Jolli package will go for N4,850 from N3,950. Multichoice said its customers on the lowest GOtv package, Jinja, will be paying N3,300 monthly, as opposed to N2,700 they are currently paying.

Users of Smallie will now be paying N1,575 as against N1,300

LEADERSHIP recalls that Multichoice had increased its subscription fees twice in the past year.

[Leadership]

The 2023 Peoples Democratic Party, PDP, presidential candidate, Atiku Abubakar, has urged Governor Sim Fubara of Rivers State and Governor Dapo Abiodun of Ogun State to investigate the twin tanker explosions in their states thoroughly.

Atiku made the call while condoning with the families of those who lost their loved ones in the fire incidents.

Posting on X, with the title: “My condolences to the families of the victims of the twin tanker explosion in both Rivers and Ogun States,” Atiku wrote: “It hurts to say that I feel the anguish of those who have lost loved ones in these twin disasters. For those who lost their lives in these incidents, it is my prayer that their souls shall meet the promise of God’s mercies.

“For the bereaved that they left behind, I also pray that the Almighty shall ease the pains in your hearts and grant everyone the fortitude to bear the unfortunate loss.

“It is also my prayer, that everyone who has lost valuable belongings and property to the disaster, the Almighty shall enlarge His provisions to you and please you with something better than what was lost.

“My heartfelt condolences also to both Governor Similayi Fubara and Dapo Abiodun of Rivers and Ogun, respectively. I urged them to ensure that the government carries out thorough investigations into the incidents. -AA”

[DailyPost]

Rivers state governor, Siminalayi Fubara, has said that his team is winning the ongoing political battle in the state with Artificial Intelligence (AI)

Fubara spoke on Monday, April 29, when participants of the Executive Intelligence Management Course (EIMC-17 Syndicate 5) of the National Institute for Security Studies (NISS) paid him a courtesy visit at the Government House in Port Harcourt.

Fubara said: “You know, we are a government that does not believe in violence even when we are being provoked on all sides.

“What we want to use to fight our battles is AI. So, sincerely, we are winning with AI. When I said it, it was not a mistake. I know what I mean.”

Addressing the visitors, the governor said: “We feel very honoured at this particular time to have you in our State, especially considering the high level of security and intelligence work that you are doing.

“It will give us a good image as against what is being rumoured everywhere that the streets of Port Harcourt, are being paraded by cultists, kidnappers and all sorts of criminal elements.

“You might have also gone round and seen for yourself that Rivers State, even in the face of the political crisis, is also peaceful.

“This is because the management of the State, as of today, has always emphasised that peace is the only way and solution for development. So, I am happy that your presence here has also helped to make us score another point before our detractors.”

The governor said policy makers needed to draw up futuristic plans that to strengthen governance when implemented while also protecting the interest of the people.

Fubara in a statement signed by his Chief Press Secretary (CPS), Nelson Chukwudi, emphasised that his administration was ready to leverage AI to significantly enhance operational efficiency and transform citizen experiences.

The governor said that advanced societies were accelerating the use of artificial intelligence for a faster data-driven decision-making process

He said: “Today, we are moving from the aspect of physical battle to intellectual battle and Artificial Intelligence (AI) is the right model to use to fight crime.

“As a state, we did not hesitate to accept your invitation because we want to tap into it. We want to be part of this success, knowing fully well that your success will also rub off on our state.

 “I heard you say here that, at the end of the visit, your report will be part of what would be used to formulate policies.

“It’s very important and we know quite alright that, for us to do better than what we are doing, we need policies that are strong, futuristic, and can strengthen governance as well as policies that would protect the interest of the common man.”

Fubara assured that his administration was determined to work with the institute to build a strong synergy that would ease the processes of governance.

He directed the Secretary of the Rivers State Government, Dr Tammy Danagogo, to sustain contact with the group so that its final report could be made available to the state.

He said: “It is important we get the final report so that it can help us in some of our planning and other strategies”. 

The governor said that to build a very successful nation, it was important for everybody to work as a team.

“Such teamwork will diminish tendencies to engage in unhealthy rivalry and frustrate politics of bitterness, particularly because government was a continuum.

“After my administration, another person, definitely, will take over, but what is important is for us to work for the common interest of everybody, not for self. If we are talking about self, we will be very destructive. Our policies will be very myopic and short-sighted.

“I want to urge everyone to think first about the well-being of our country. I want to appeal to everybody, let us stop this politics of bitterness and play politics of friendship.

“Let us liken it to a football match: somebody has to win, somebody has to lose. There will be another tournament, and you will try again to see if you can reclaim your medal. That is the way life should be seen.

“It shouldn’t be an issue of unnecessary competition. It shouldn’t be an issue of unnecessary rivalry that leads to bitterness, leads to sickness of the bone. We should try and emulate better relationships”, he said.

In his speech, the Head of the delegation, Didacus Egor Egbeji, said that officers at the rank of not less than deputy directors were in the state for a weeklong study tour as part of the requirements of their 10-month course at the institute.

Egbeji, who is also the Deputy Commandant of the National Institute for Security Studies, explained that the participants were strategic leaders who, in the next 5 years, would likely head their different agencies and would be using gains from the training to ensure efficiency at their agencies.

He said: “The training has to do with different modules. We have the security module; we have the crisis management module; we have the governance module; and we have the strategic module. As we are here, the other groups are in states, such as Cross River, Abia, Enugu, Zamfara, and Kogi.

“We are expected, after this one-week tour, to go back to the institute to make a presentation of what we found in Rivers State in terms of the theme of the course which is “Artificial Intelligence, Security and Emerging Economies in Africa: Challenges and Prospects.

“It is after this submission that we are also expected to embark on a study tour of six African states. By the end of next month, after the tour of the African states, by September, we will embark on a tour of six other countries across the globe.”

[TheNation]

The Executive Director of Citizens Advocacy for Social Economic Rights, Frank Tietie, has said it is disgraceful for Nigeria to be facing the Premium Motor Spirit crisis.

Tietie said he was surprised, shocked, and deeply embarrassed by the ongoing fuel scarcity in Nigeria when he featured on a programme on Arise TV on Monday.

He stressed that the purpose of subsidy removal for efficient petroleum supplies has not been achieved as there were long queues everywhere.

“I am surprised, shocked and highly embarrassed that this is happening after all the much talked about subsidy removal to ensure efficiency in the supplies of petroleum products.

“It is highly disgraceful that this is happening after a certain somewhat explanation by the NNPCL that the queues and shortage of PMS were a result of logistics problems. What a nebulous way to take Nigerians for granted. Whether it is logistics associated with lack of trucking facilities or anything that has to do with transportation,” he said.

He lamented that people are hawking fuel in jerricans in front of establishments like Transport Hilton and NNPCL in Abuja despite the scarcity in legal filling stations.

This, he said, demonstrated the inefficiency of the Nigerian National Petroleum Company Limited and the regulatory authority responsible for ensuring stock availability.

He also criticised their negligence towards national security and job security for officials while taking Nigerians for granted.

“The resilience of Nigerians will always be considered something to be abused when you simply say logistics and nothing happens when it is four days after the so-called logistics problem.

“There is scarcity and queues are everywhere. In fact, one of the most embarrassing things you can experience is that in front of the NNPCL in Abuja, you will see people hawking petrol in jerricans. Another very terrible scene is the situation where one of Nigeria’s foremost hotels that hosts many International conferences, Transcorp Hilton, right in front of Hilton advertising to the world, you will see all of these persons hawking petrol in plastic jerricans,” he added.

Despite the logistics problem highlighted as a factor responsible for the scarcity of fuel, Tietie said there is enough fuel for sale in the black market.

He added that the NNPCL has not been efficient in discharging its role.

“Does it mean that these ruffians have a way of solving logistic problems more than the NNPCL? Somehow, this must stop because we must stop this idea of making our country a laughing stock.

“It all sounds like a joke because you said there are queues everywhere and when you go to the front of the Hilton, you will see some people hawking petrol. You go to the front of NNPCL, well it is understandable that you have two major petrol stations in front of the NNPCL headquarters and you will see street urchins hawking fuel.

“This is a result of clear inefficiency on the part of the NNPCL this time. It probably extends to the authorities- the Nigerian Mainstream and Downstream Petroleum Regulatory Authority. They are supposed to be responsible for ensuring that there is some measure of stock in storage,” he stated.

Their negligence, he said endangers national security.

“What this means is that this authority and NNPCL are toying with Nigerian security. When you cannot guarantee for days the supply of PMS that is the mainstay of your national economy then it’s clear you are taking for granted the national security. That is the reason why the president is not calling them to order.

“Whereas we don’t have energy security, we have job security for the officials of the NNPC and NNPDRA and that’s the reason we continue to have it not minding what Nigerians are going through,” Tietie added.

Speaking further, Tietie said he is disappointed in the government for allowing such a situation to persist in a major oil-producing country like Nigeria.

He stressed that refineries in Nigeria would not function due to the benefits it give to a certain establishment class.

He added, “We all know that it is for certain mysterious reasons that refineries have refused to work whereas we understand it benefits a certain establishment class in this country that the refineries won’t and will never work no matter the commitment of any of the administrations whether it was Goodluck Jonathan, Muhammad Buhari or the current administration of Bola Tinubu.

“The refineries won’t work. Everybody is expecting the Dangote refinery to kick off so we can have a measure of the availability of PMS. We run a country in such a manner that takes the people for granted and we will now see people run the government and states without any sense of responsibility and shame.

“How can we as a major oil-producing country in the world have this kind of situation? And then we have an NNPCL that wants to pride itself that it is competing with a certain Saudi ARAMCO whereas it cannot provide any form of energy security for its country.

“In fact the NNPC is supposed to be a fallback on in terms of energy security meaning that it takes pride in being the sole importer of petroleum products. Why should we even be importing petroleum products in the first place? and if we must import, it will be to cater to issues of unnecessary disruption if ever we go to war, for example, not a norm that we should constantly have this uncertainty.

“Those who are running NNPCL should foresee any disruption problem that is about to come and the NNDPRA should have enough stock. What these guys are doing is just making a laughing stock the administration of President Bola Ahamed Tinubu.”

Residents of Lagos and other areas in Nigeria are currently facing difficulties in obtaining PMS as many filling stations have remained closed over the weekend.

Despite assurances from the Nigerian NNPCL that logistical challenges causing the fuel scarcity had been resolved, long queues at filling stations have persisted. Some stations were found to be selling PMS for prices between N700 and N800, providing an opportunity for black marketers to exploit desperate Nigerians by selling a litre for N1,000 or more.

[Punch]

Governor Godwin Obaseki of Edo State has announced a new minimum wage of N70,000 for civil servants. 

The governor made this known on Monday, while inaugurating the Labour House.

Obaseki named the Labour House after Adams Oshiomhole, Senator representing Edo North, and former governor of the state.

“The new minimum wage regime in Edo will take effect from May 1, 2024,” the governor said.

Recall the Nigeria Labour Congress, NLC, and Trade Union Congress, TUC, have been pushing for a new minimum wage for workers across states. This is coming on the heels of the hardship occasioned by the economic reforms of President Bola Tinubu’s administration.

The removal of subsidy on petrol and unification of the forex windows in 2023, immediately led to food inflation and a spike in the prices of other goods and services.

Meanwhile, the national minimum wage has been pegged at N30,000 since April 18, 2019.

However, this sum has been described as “grossly inadequate” and “poverty wage” in the face of prevailing economic hardship.

More details coming on the minimum wage announced by Obaseki.

[Vanguard News]

Finidi George has been appointed as the new head coach of the Super Eagles.

The Nigeria Football Federation (NFF) announced Finidi’s appointment in a communique on Monday.

More to follow…

“Has the Ooni ever told the president that the worst road in the universe leads to his kingdom? Has he told the president that the N79.8 billion contract for the reconstruction of Ibadan-Ife-Ilesa road awarded in September, 2019 by his friend and villa mate, Muhammadu Buhari, has remained a contract for ghosts? Has he invited the president’s attention to the truth that since last year when he took over, the road has sunk even deeper in the mire of decrepitude? And, that even FERMA, a perennially rich agency that pretends giving palliatives on federal roads, has since seen the futility of stitching this rag? Or could it be that Kabiyesi does what our presidents since 1999 do – escaping road users’ pains by flying over our heads”?

One day, I will have the courage to ask the immaculate Ooni of Ife, Oba Enitan Ogunwusi, how he feels each time he travels on the horrible Ibadan-Ife road. Ben Okri, ‘The Famished Road’ storyteller, finds his own ‘road’ a torment – he says it “leads home and then away from it, without end.” Okri thinks the road a torment because he meets it “with too many signs and no direction.” The Ife-Ibadan road has signs, it has directions – and I find them very treacherously significant because they interlock fingers while road users lose life and limbs. The road has signs and directions to the very bowel of hell.

Olojo, the guardian divinity of the House of Oduduwa, is the famed owner of two machetes: with one machete, he prepares the field for the plants of tomorrow; with the other, he clears the road for prosperity (Ó fì’kan sán’ko/ Ó fì kan yè’nà). Those weapons must either now be blunt or lost. An Odu Ifa tells us something about Ile Ife and roads. It affirms that well-paved open roads start from Ile Ife. That affirmation today can only be treated on the operating theatre of irony. Could it be that truth has an expiry date and Ogbe’s truth of good, open roads in Ile Ife has expired? What we see today from the capital of Yorubaland (Ibadan) to the historical source of Yoruba people is the torment of a closed road that mocks the pathfinder-spirit of Oduduwa. The road does worse with its gaping craters and their threats of morphing into greater gullies. And it is a federal road.

Has the Ooni ever told the president that the worst road in the universe leads to his kingdom? Has he told the president that the N79.8 billion contract for the reconstruction of Ibadan-Ife-Ilesa road awarded in September, 2019 by his friend and villa mate, Muhammadu Buhari, has remained a contract for ghosts? Has he invited the president’s attention to the truth that since last year when he took over, the road has sunk even deeper in the mire of decrepitude? And, that even FERMA, a perennially rich agency that pretends giving palliatives on federal roads, has since seen the futility of stitching this rag? Or could it be that Kabiyesi does what our presidents since 1999 do – escaping road users’ pains by flying over our heads?

The reigning culture here is rooted in the ragged soils of our toil. I admit that badness is not peculiar to the Ife-Ibadan-Ilesa road. It is a national affliction that can’t be cured because of the greed of doctors who treat sick roads with fake and expired drugs.

We work hard to build roads that wear out before they are inaugurated. We have the interminable construction mess called Lagos-Ibadan Expressway. When did construction start there? When will it end – if it will ever end? How much have we sunk there? And, is it not a shame that the road is ready already for corrective surgery even before its makers are done making it? If you are a woman, and you are pregnant and your doctor tells you dancing is a ‘safe and fun way to exercise’, do not dance to the break beats of that road. It is made for abortion.

Ben Okri says “all roads lead to death” and “some roads lead to things which can never be finished.” Is that why our federal government’s roads are forever ongoing, none is ever finished or completed? Federal government’s statistics says out of Nigeria’s national road network of 200,000 kilometers, 36,289 km belong to it. Now, you ask Abuja which of its other roads, apart from the one from the Villa to Abuja airport, is good? Ask them why almost all roads that wear federal tags suffer neglect, abandonment or crass abuse.

My NYSC journey to the far north 34 years ago was on the Ibadan-Ilorin-Jebba-Mokwa-Yauri road. It was an experience in pleasantness. It is, today, a monument to frustration, a shrine to demons that feed on losses -human and material. The Ibadan-Oyo-Ogbomoso part of that road is one major reason why Nigeria should not have a federal government – or have roads managed by the Federal Government. There should be a coroner’s inquest on why that road was killed and who killed it. Without the states, the vehicle of Nigeria would have long lost its chassis. States keep doing what heart surgeons do when arteries are found blocked. They create bypasses, byways. A brand new 78-kilometre Iseyin-Ogbomosho road has just been built by Seyi Makinde’s Oyo State to escape the Federal Government’s death trap along that axis. A commenter online wrote: “The road has helped us to link northern Nigeria without using the dangerous Oyo-Ilorin road that has consumed so many lives…” The Oyo-Ilorin road of death spoken of here belongs to the government in Abuja.

Potholes jolt us to appreciate what bad roads represent in our lives. They tell us why the tyres of our country never last and why our rides are forever bumpy. Asking questions on why our roads are perennially bad is living the times of Ayi Kwei Armah’s ‘Two Thousand Seasons’: “A thousand seasons wasted wandering amazed along alien roads, another thousand spent finding paths to the living way.” Like Ouroboros, the self-tail-devourer, Nigeria’s ‘alien roads’ cyclically keep consuming the ‘living way.’

It is time to pound yam for the household, the idler among us goes for the heaviest pestle. This is better said in Yoruba: Òle bàá tì, ó gb’ódó nlá. There are abandoned federal roads everywhere which directly affect millions of Nigerians, but the government has moved the money to a 700km super coastal highway that will cost N15.6 trillion. The first phase is 47 kilometres, starting somewhere and ending nowhere, at a cost of N1.06 trillion. Should I just say that that N1 trillion will start and complete the reconstruction of decrepit Ibadan-Ife-Ilesa Road (224km), Ilorin to Bida (244.9km) and Shagamu to Benin (492km) if wisdom wills? Even at an inflated cost of N1 billion per kilometre, our husbands will achieve these and will even ‘collect change’. And Tinubu would have become very popular with it. But he wants a white elephant and has moved our money to purchase it.

White elephants are always expensive! Poet and journalist, Mathew Wills, in his ‘The Original White Elephant’ defines ‘white elephant’ as “something excessive that turns out to be valueless.” James A. Robinson and Ragnar Torvik in 2005 published an interesting article about the third world and deliberate bad investments – they titled their article: ‘White Elephants’. In that piece, they hold that politicians around here would always go for “white elephants” as against “socially efficient projects” because “the political benefits are large compared to the surplus generated by efficient projects.” That piece says much more than this. It is published in the Journal of Public Economics 89 (2005: 197-210). I think you should read it.

‘The Stolen White Elephant’ by Mark Twain is an interesting story on the cost of investing in big, expensive loss centres. It is the story of a fictional Kingdom of Siam. A reviewer says Siam is blessed with a “national appetite for fraud”. Another says it has officers of “pompous assumption of infallibility and ridiculous inappropriate procedures.” The “pointless” story is about an expensive search for a stolen white elephant, a further loss of hundreds of thousands of dollars in compensation and the eventual discovery of the rotting corpse of the supposedly stolen animal. The story ends with the duped narrator celebrating the man who duped him. It ends as the man pronounces himself “a ruined man and a wanderer in the earth.” In Studies in American Humour, Peter Messent (1995) does a lot of justice to it in his ‘Keeping Both Eyes Open.’ The whole story sounds Nigerian; what Fela called “expensive shit.” But I can argue that though we wander today, the past was a better experience.

“How can you develop a country rapidly if you can’t get about it?” Sir Rex Niven, pre-independence Speaker of Northern Nigeria House of Assembly, asked that question 69 years ago in relation to the state of roads in Nigeria. On January 27, 1955, Riven was asked to brief the Royal African Society and the Royal Empire Society in London on “Recent Developments in Nigeria.” He gave a very detailed account of himself as a British participant in the affairs of a key component of the Nigerian federation. Sector by sector, he spoke about efforts and failures. He particularly spoke on roads which he described as “the most important of the great aspects of development.” He said as he was speaking (in 1955), Nigeria had over 30,000 miles of roads whereas in 1920, “she had hardly any at all.” Then he used Kabba (in present Kogi State) to illustrate what he was saying: “The first province I went to, the newly constituted Kabba Province, had exactly 4 miles of road…but when I left Kabba four years later, there were over 200 miles of road.” Thirteen years later, the same Niven, in retirement, told the Commonwealth section of the Royal African Society on 11 November, 1969 that Nigeria had 40,000 miles of quality roads. That figure was even in spite of the ongoing civil war. Now, you ask: Why are our golden years always in the past? The past was obviously better handled.